Flat3D

Continuing as planned

In several ways. The job at GCD is going well, people are very friendly, work is relatively enjoyable (at least it isn’t boring yet!) and everything is nice. School is going well too, I’m finding time to work on things and enjoying that as well. Social life isn’t so healthy I think, but it’s as healthy as it would be working full time at a software company so not too bad!

In other news the Polish English classes have finally seen something happen. We are having a meeting on Wednesday night and Adrian and John (the other one) have been to some doors and inviting some people. So we will see if they come on Wednesday. If you are a prayer (as in someone who prays, not something that is prayed) please pray!

GCD Technology…

Yesterday I had my first day at GCD. It was pretty good… Obviously it’s going to be the same old first day stuff… Learning the basics of their systems but still not being too sure how they use them. I also did some basic work, which probably took 4 times as long then had one of the other guys done it…
But everyone is very friendly and, as it’s only a small company (7 people including me…) I am very glad I was accepted in so readily.

I am still slightly concerned with the workload. I am down to work 20 hours a week (Monday, Friday and Wednesday afternoons) but I am not sure how much they are going to expect from me or place on me… 20 hours is sitting on my limit and as I was reminded by my friend Gigi on MSN yesterday, engineering (including software engineering) usually takes up more time than anyone expects it to… But I am on “probation” till the end of December, so my plan is to work in the way I would be able to until then and see if they still want me!

I feel like God has lead me to this though. If I am to go back to Japan with OMF, it will probably be in a practical support capacity as a “tech guy” in the office (I don’t know what the term would be…. Systems engineer?). It’d probably also include working with the missionaries on computer problems, recommendations and all that jazz… And with my degree and with computing in general, if you don’t keep your hand in you can easily be left behind. I have been praying (and friends have been praying) about a job for quite a while and looking at all kinds of options, and applying to various options, all techy to some degree, but without much success. Then one sunday evening I was talking to Featch (?) about it and he mentioned his dad might have some work with the farmer’s union, but he didn’t. Though he also talked to his cousin (partner at GCD) and his cousin seemed interested to chat to me, so I went for a chat and started yesterday. It was all pretty easy compared to the other attempts, just sort of happened. And looking back it is certainly an answer to my prayers, my only concern is that it might be an answer like Saul to Israel’s cries for a king. An answer to teach me a lesson about priorities and time management!
However, I just don’t know, and if it is the second then at least I’ll learn something… So please keep praying if you were, that God will be clear to me and strengthen me or loosen me! Thanks guys!

IYFEG

So I feel quite a bit better today, a good chat with some friends online and a bit more rationality brought on by sleep help a lot!

Also I got a job today! I heard back from an interview with GCD Technology in Lisburn starting on Friday and working 2.5 days a week. I’m on a probationary period until the end of December. But it’s all good!

I’m also working on a seminar I’m co-leading on Wednesday on whether Saul or David was the first “real” king of Israel…. It’s quite interesting, but a lot of reading to bring forth my side of the discussion, the case for David.

In other news this appeared in a module on my google home page….
IYFEG

so… Paddy IYFEGman, Paddy IYFEGman and Paddy IYFEGman were having a race….

Ups and Downs

Since I got back from Japan I have been on ups and downs. I know everyone will say that everyone’s faith rises and falls, but I’ve never experienced it like this. At good times I am confident that God will provide. If I go back to Japan God will honour my following Him and provide for me.
At other times I feel like I am abandoning all sense and prudent future planning. My friends are all capitalising on their time spent in education by getting jobs and earning cash, they are buying houses and getting on the property ladder, it seems everytime I’m at RUSH (the young adults group at church) they are talking about work, which is to be expected as its what they spend most of their time doing, and buying houses, who’s working on what part of their house now, who’s managed to get a decent property etc. This usually leaves me feeling lagging because Im not at that stage yet…. yet?… Yet? That’s when I catch myself. If I go to Japan (as a missionary) and stay for a while I won’t be at that stage anytime soon. I might never be at that stage. If I go off to Japan and come home in 25 years time I won’t be on the ladder and certainly will have no prospect of being on it.
Then I look around the missionaries I have met and know and see missionaries at all levels of subsistance. Some have a house to home their family, others don’t have two sticks to rub together. On the good days this doesn’t bother me because I can see how God is providing for them and can think He would provide for me too. But on the bad days I think “Sure he is providing for them now but when they retire it’ll be a different story!” or even think that he might be providing for them, but he won’t provide for me.
Having finished with that I move onto wondering how I would support a family if I God decides to bless me with one. What would I have to offer my kids?
Sometimes I even get to the stage of wondering if he exists at all. I find myself evaluating my life and prospects and think but what if God doesn’t exist? What if I’m wrong?

My faith has been rollercoastering like this for a while. I don’t know what I am going to do. My mum says I shouldn’t worry about it because any decisions etc are a year or two (or three or more) away and God may have different plans for me. Which is true I guess. But at the moment I feel like following other plans would be abandoning what God has placed before me (which is probably how Samuel felt when God was telling him to stop mourning Saul and get on looking for David…)

Anyways thought I would write it up here to get a bit off my mind. I’m verging on a low ebb at the moment…